pathetic fallacy

Do you ever feel as though you are going through an intense scene in a movie or a novel? At these moments you recognize the ironies, foreshadows and pathetic fallacies. Today is just one of those days for me; outside my window I watch the torrent of rain cascading down the pavement. Streams trickle down the glass, as the heavens weep, so as to reflect the anguish in my soul.

I wouldn't recognize this pathetic fallacy had it not been for my father. We used to watch movies together recognizing the literary devices--he taught me to look for them, study, and analyze them. He showed me that often rain was an indication that the main character was going through some intense grief; the rain acted as a symbol for tears.

Instilling within me a love for symbols, literary devices, literature and learning, is just one of the ways my father has impacted my life. As a teacher (now retired), he has modelled to me the importance of life long learning; as an artist, the value of seeing God's "art" around me; as a servant of God, humility, zeal and generosity; as an alien to a new country, ingenuity, hard work, and perseverance; and as a father, time, commitment and love. Attempting to describe my father's impact is like trying to describe how the balance of the ocean is affected by one drop of rain--impossible. Yet, just as that ocean needs that drop of rain, this world needs my father--he is leaving a legacy in my life, and on this earth.

Today the earth groans, and the rain is my tears. This morning I heard news that my dad suffered a heart attack--the second one after seventeen years. This news was numbing, frightening, and relieving all in one breath. I had the same feelings wash over me when I was just a little girl--a calming helplessness, for it was after his first attack that I really knew that God answers prayer. I began to see the foreshadow of scripture that I read this morning--Luke 18's parable of being persistent in prayer.

Today has been filled with tear-filled prayers for my father, as sorrow has a way of erasing one's schedule. What else can I do? Distance is felt the most in suffering, and I can feel the miles between us. Yet the irony of it all is that I have chosen this path, I have chosen to follow the Lord--I said yes to the distance. It is times like these where the "rubber meets the road", and we are called to remember those moments of obedience.

Yet God is good. He writes my novel, he pens each scene. Today he has given me the rain, today the heaven's weep with me! He fills my heart with hope, and I can trust that all will turn out well. In fact, I can rejoice that I can remember my father while he is alive! Please remember him with me.

Dad, I love you and I am praying for you! Your faith will be made sight!

(the above painting was made by my talented father--I like to call it "after the rain"...not sure what it's actual title is:))